Have you ever gone from the front seat of a car doing 50 miles an hour straight into the back seat of a car doing 10??
And that was my Easter Monday....
It’s the expertise of Hollywood stunt men or if you live in my World, a leisurely drive with the Marvelous Mummy at the wheel!
By now we all know who the Marvelous Mummy is, well I certainly do, she has been bugging the life out of me for 12 glorious years now, with no end in sight.
But some of you may need a refresh, so for those who don’t hang around here all that often, the Marvelous Mummy is my Wife and of course the mother of our two delightful children.
Like all Women she has her issues. One of which is the desire to follow the human herd & visit a popular local touristy place during a Bank holiday. Like insects to the blue flickering light I’m convinced it’s some sort of mental deficiency she shares with much of mankind!
I on the other hand am sensible, so I’m adamant that I don’t leave the house on Bank Holidays or Public Holidays. I’m not, you might be surprised to learn, a people person. So venturing out into the World, on a day that many other people will congregate in the same place we will end up, is not a prospect which holds appeal.
Being of advancing years, stubborn, proudly grumpy & crucially, Married! I of course find myself on Easter Monday, a public holiday, being packed into the car and driven out into the public domain.
Where after 15 minutes of road cruising we of course hit traffic & by hit I don’t just mean a traffic jam. On two separate but equally profanity inducing occasions I nearly found myself a passenger in the car in front, the tension only melted slightly by the giggling from our eldest son who seems to enjoy Daddy’s rainbow vocabulary!
This is where I decided to take a vow of silence for the day.
Cue movie type bridging montage..
We stopped at Stormont’s new play Park, which to be fair looks amazing & well worth a visit, well it will be when it opens in June..
A look at the big empty house that is our Parliament buildings
Back in the car & slightly less scary drive over to Newtownards!
Watch the small planes landing at the local airfield..
Cut the music, back to reality & we are parking up at the Marvelous Mummy’s cherry on top! The Circus... ah for feck sake!
The Circus visits our Town once a year & never once have I felt the desire to go, so it’s a puzzler how I end up queueing at the big top of Fossetts Circus on waste ground off a roundabout in Newtownards.
Still committed to my vow of silence I ponder that internally as I am ushered in by a heavily tattooed bloke more at home on the door of a dodgy pub! Having not paid for the two rows of clearly premium ringside plastic seats, we climb the five rows of bleachers & select an empty row of hard plastic seats, it’s at this stage i find it difficult to contain my excitement
The show itself is like Britain’s got Talent in a tent (I won’t spoil it in case you’re planning to go yourself) & lasts so long it needs a 25 minute intermission..
Long after my numb ass raised a white flag, the show is finally it’s over & my plan to pull the fire alarm to escape this merry hell is aborted. We emerge back into the sunny Newtownards evening & begin the fun car games filled journey home. I win 17 back to back rounds of ‘Dummy’s Meeting’ without even breaking a sweat.
Eventually we pull into the drive & unload the family truckster, flopping into bed soon after. Another Easter Monday filled with precious memories is over
I drift off to the land of nod, excited for my upcoming blog rant! It’s good to rant
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