School sucks, doesn’t it?

Just as June ends with Joy for anyone of school age, September begins with celebration for anyone with anyone of school age!

Those long sunny days of refereeing fights between thing 1 & thing 2 & emptying my bank account on never ending trips to the cinema/McDonalds/The Toy Shop are at an end!

I smile widely as those two little, well one is growing like a weed, parcels of snot & trapped wind begrudgingly donned their uniforms & shiny for a fortnight shoes, to make the short car journey to a new term of education & clock watching misery...

Que maniacal laugh... 😆 😆

But wait, what’s that beaming look across their faces? No, no no no no, fecking no! Wait just a minute, why are they smiling? What’s with the laughter? Don’t they understand that it’s back to SCHOOL! The very words I spent my childhood glaring at in disgust as they swung tauntingly from the ceiling in Belfast’s long gone C&A!!

This isn’t a time for happiness or joy, it’s dread! Pure dread, resignation to the fact that the summer is dead! The return of Homework, early rising & even earlier to bed.

Yet here they both are, chittering excitedly. Almost happy to be facing what awaits them!

Surely these two can’t be mine? The Wife will certainly need to be interrogated over this one!

They couldn’t even give me one simple win. Both are happy to be going to school! Is this real or an elaborate & frankly genius rib on me! Could a 7 & 4 year old be a match for my japes, at such a young age!

Or, is it the case that they actually WANT to go to school? Has school become a place of such happiness & joy that kids look forward to being there? I am actually torn between having my moment in the sun after two months of torture and being pleased that they seemingly want to learn. 

I want to take the adult view, be proud that my creations are keen to learn and content to return to that environment. Reaffirmed that I must be doing something right in raising them, or that the Mrs is and I'm taking some of that credit. But... I just cant do it, that little devilish voice is on my shoulder again, "What's going on here big lad, you were never happy to see September?"

Truth is I  have never known people like this before and its kinda terrifying. How do I talk to them, what should I say? What if they are smarter than me by the time they reach double figures?

Perhaps I should start listening to them, I might learn something?

What am I saying, this is ridiculous.

School is back and I'm free to waste my mornings again. Good luck teachers, they are all yours